You’ve been trying to conceive for months now with no luck. You’ve not been trying long enough to take on the cost of a fertility specialist and your gynecologist keeps telling you to relax and keep trying because some couples have more trouble than others conceiving. This middle place – a nowhere land of emotion – can wreak havoc on your sex life. Suddenly, one day you wake up and you realize that sex isn’t fun anymore. Somewhere along the journey to parenthood you’ve stopped enjoying the time you spend with your partner, but how can you conceive if you don’t enjoy the act of sex?

Sex, Emotional Stress and Conception
Sure, conception can happen during times of emotional stress, but if there are conception and fertility issues already on the plate, stress is not something you need to add to the picture. Stress can cause physical changes in the body that make it harder to conceive. These changes are rooted in the times of our ancient ancestors when stress could mean there was not enough food or the village was under attack. The female body shuts off fertility as a protective measure. In today’s world, famine and war are parts of life, but not immediate threats to many couples facing fertility issues, but the human body doesn’t know the difference between emotional stress and physical stress. It all feels the same and the body reacts the same. 

Giving Up on Conception to Conceive Faster
Have you ever heard the old wife’s tale that says you need to stop trying so hard to have a baby? There is more to this phrase than meets the ears. When a couple tries too hard to conceive that stress I just mentioned can creep into the picture and ruin the natural processes of the body. Believe it or not – and unfortunately you may have experienced this already – emotional stress from infertility can even end successful, happy marriages – so stop trying to conceive. 

Sex should be a natural part of life that both you and your partner enjoy. Fertility issues are very real and there are treatments and options for couples facing insistent infertility problems, but there is a general waiting period of 6 to 12 months before couples are advised to seek treatment. So, in the meantime stop focusing on conception and start focusing on bringing the spark back into your love life, just leave the contraception behind.