I blame Hollywood for convincing me that pregnancy was going to be nothing but rosy cheeks, smiles and tummy rubs from strangers. I always knew I wanted to be a mom, but I never expected to hate being pregnant. After the first pregnancy I thought things would change, but I hated the two pregnancies that followed as well. There was nothing beautiful, special or exceptionally amazing about being pregnant – I just stuck it out for the end prize – being a mom.
Why is Pregnancy So Difficult for Some Women?
Young girls are often too little to remember mom being pregnant, so Hollywood is the main representation we have for how pregnancy will look and feel. I remember being a kid watching movies thinking that every woman started labor in a restaurant or during a dinner party. Take a moment to think about the movies you’ve watched with pregnant women going into labor. The majority of those women were with friends in some intimate setting – right?
The reality of pregnancy is that labor doesn’t necessarily start with your water breaking in some public place or with a group of friends around waiting to rush you to the hospital. And, for some women like me, labor never starts at all. There is no dinner party or night out at the restaurant when you’re 40 weeks pregnant; Hollywood lied.
My pregnancy was extremely difficult because I’m short and my singlets weighed nearly 11 pounds and my twins weighed more than 13 pounds combined. Pregnancy was hard, painful and caused me to go deaf thanks to extreme head congestion on all three occasions. I was bed ridden for the majority of my third pregnancy – so my life did not mirror any pregnancy I’d ever been accustomed to.
Just because your pregnancy is not all dinner and roses doesn’t mean you’re a bad mom or a bad person. I love being a mom and my kids are my everything, but being pregnant was absolutely one nof the worst experiences of my life.