Pregnancy is a thrilling and heartwarming time in the lives of couples. Unfortunately, you're not always on the same page mentally, physically or emotionally during this time - and that can sometimes be a source of friction if you're not on the lookout for potential miscommunications.
State of Mind for Moms-to-Be
All thoughts, for most women, are on the baby at this point. You may still be working, but you're beginning to feel big, cumbersome and maybe even unattractive. You're running out of energy by the end of the day, and you're not sleeping all that well at night. Couple that with excess hormones and you're an emotional powder keg ready to blow at the slightest glance from your husband or Kleenex commercial on television. In addition, you’ll likely experience a natural shift in your focus on your significant other (and vice versa) as your brand new attention-getter gets closer to coming into the world.
What's Going on in His World?
The last thing on your mind, unfortunately for him, is sex. That puts a bit of a strain on your relationship because this is a time when he thinks you are most beautiful and attractive and he wants to express his love for you in the one way he knows best - physically. He’ll also be anxious to meet his new bundle of joy, but along with that may come his unspoken anxiety about whether he will live up to the great expectations of the father he wants to be.
Changing the Romance Dynamic
Believe it or not, the third trimester is only a hint of things to come. It's the beginning of a completely new dynamic in your relationship. The most critical romantic element you at your disposal during the third trimester and beyond is your collective voices. You need to talk about how you feel and what's going on inside your hearts and minds.
The baby will bring changes to your lives and, to some degree, your romance, but that doesn't mean that romance is dead. In fact, it forces you both to "up your game" a bit.
- Designate daily couple time: This is the time you spend talking about things that are important to you.
- Make time for intimacy: While sex is important to any good relationship, it's not the only kind of intimacy there is. You do not want to skip sex altogether, but don't overlook the importance of casual intimacy for strengthening your relationship. Rub shoulders, scratch backs, massage aching legs, and feet, or simply hold hands.
These things work wonders physically, mentally and emotionally. More importantly, making these things habits will help the two of you stay connected, romantically, no matter how hectic things become during the third trimester and beyond. And, after the birth of your baby, you’ll discover a whole new way to love each other, as parents.