The best time to tell a child about the upcoming baby is after mom's tummy is large enough to show through clothing. A child cannot understand that a baby is in the womb. They can, however, notice changes to the tummy when mom begins to show.

  1. Wait to tell them - A child cannot understand that a baby is in the womb. They can, however, notice changes to the tummy when mom begins to show. The best time to tell a child about the upcoming baby is after mom's tummy is large enough to show through clothing.
  2. Allow them to feel baby - When baby kicks, this is the perfect time to bring life to baby. Even though the child already knows mom is pregnant, the idea of another life inside of mom's tummy is a hard concept to grasp. When the child feels the movement, they will better understand.
  3. Give them a new space - As mom and dad are decorating for baby, redecorate the other child (ren)s room as well. This will show them that baby is not the only one mom and dad is celebrating.
  4. Explain a baby and the care it takes - A baby is hard work, but children often look at the small wonder and relate them to a baby doll. The care of a toy is far different than the care of a baby and the child can learn that from mom and dad.
  5. Show them pictures of when they were a baby - Does your child understand that they were once a baby? Many children have little understanding of the growth process because there is no memory of being a baby. The best way to relate the new baby to their lives is to bring out the old baby photos. If there are ultrasound pictures this is even better.
  6. Visit a daycare or baby ward - While pictures are great, the real thing is even better. Children can learn about the size of baby and the fragility of the new child by seeing new children. Many hospital wards will allow moms to bring children in to view the new babies through the ward windows.
  7. Allow them to hold a friends baby - If a friend or family member has a baby, ask them to allow your child to hold the baby under close supervision. Again, the stories and talks are great, but the reality of holding the baby will teach a lesson that words can never touch.
  8. Plan free time just with the child - The child may begin to feel as though their life will change 100% when baby arrives. This can cause animosity toward the new baby and a feeling of abandonment. Planning free time before and after baby with the child is a great way to stay bonded with the other child(ren).
  9. Encourage the child to talk and ask questions - Many children have a ton of questions about baby and the birth process. This is not the time to sugar coat anything. If mom goes into labor, children as young as 2 or 3 can feel their mom's pain. Children can understand a lot if they are given the chance and the truth.
  10. Buy them a baby doll - A baby doll is a good way to teach them the basics of caring for baby. It is a good idea to get more than one so everyone in the family can practice diapering and feeding baby. While "learning" with the baby doll, mom and dad need to reinforce the idea that this is just practice and that the new baby is not a doll.
  11. Reassure them there is enough love to go around - Love is a tangible thing for children. They really feel as though a new baby could take their love away. Mom and dad need to talk with their children about the fact that there is enough love in the home to go around to all children.
  12. Allow the child to attend the birth - For older children, seeing the birth process brings a new meaning to having a brother or sister (or both). Parents will need to judge their child's readiness for the graphic event.
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